Apathy... It's been on my mind for a while.
I've been in that apathetic state plenty of times in my life.
If you don't know what apathy is, it's when you're so out of whack that you can't motivate yourself.
Even worse, you have no desire to try.
It's when you just say, "Let it all burn to the ground. I don't give one single shit!"
And you mean it!
There are lots of "clinical" explanations for what causes it.
But from my own experience, apathy only creeps in when the coping mechanisms stop working.
When the things you use to make you feel better end up making you stop feeling at all. The drugs, food, alcohol, porn, overachieving, success, money—you name it.
It doesn’t really matter what your drug of choice is, from opioids to millions of dollars. At some point, they stop working.
And when they stop working to make you feel better, you stop feeling.
The only way I know out of this shit hole—a place that sucks a rotten goat's ass to be stuck in—is two things:
STOP! Stop the coping mechanisms.
Easier said than done, I know. No one wants to thrust themselves into the hell they've created. But if you want to get your shit together, you have to. Because those coping mechanisms hijack your biology and severely water down your natural power and strength.Feel the shit you're trying to avoid AFTER you put the coping mechanisms on a shelf.
But if you've reached the point where you've outpaced your coping mechanisms, it's usually because you're avoiding some pretty BIG f'ing pain. Rightfully so. It hurts like hell! It's humiliating. You're forced to face hard truths. And you're still at a point where you're judging yourself and inflicting shame on yourself.
You have to accept that life took a hard turn somewhere along the way. You missed a few trains of opportunity, thinking they'd come back. You stopped taking care of yourself. You lost love that you didn't have to. And you blame yourself.
The first thing to do is just realize... you're not that special or unique!
Every one of us has dealt with this.
We said yes when we should have said no, and we said no when we should have said yes. That's all the charge it needs to have. There's no reason to dig up all the terrible things you did or dump the drama bucket over your head. You fucked up! So what?
Go find me one single person who hasn't! I'll wait...
You can't!
But that doesn’t make you a fuck up. And it does NOT mean your life is over. Want to know the most f'ed up thing of all? Avoiding responsibility and pain through coping mechanisms is a thousand times more painful than just owning your shit. Make amends where you can (even if that’s with yourself by forgiving yourself). Put down the coping mechanisms. Pick up one thing that gets you moving in a direction that leads you closer to another chance, another opportunity, another swing at life, love, and success as you define it.
After posting this on Facebook, I've been getting a bunch of messages on this.
A lot of people are feeling this way.
People have been pushed to a breaking point.
Let it break! Holding onto old maps in a new world only causes pain and confusion.
It's time to recalibrate and restore your default values and standards. That's the only way I know to live from your power, based on your intentions and desires.
What worked before isn't working anymore for so, so, SOOOOOO many people. I'm putting a lot of focus on helping people flush out the old and safely build a new, fresh, and clean internal ecosystem.
Because like it or not, the world isn't changing. It's already changed. Don't f'ing sink all the way into complete powerlessness! You don't have to, and I 100% guarantee you'll deeply regret it if you do.
"But it's hard!"
No shit!
That's why you don't do it alone.
Because it's harder to live anywhere near that state of putrid apathy.
Let it do what it's meant to do. Be a chrysalis and catalyst for a personal elevation. ❤️